Pretending not to know includes ignoring health concerns, clutter, and unfinished business. It can also include ignoring your happiness.
The first step to a successful change is recognizing the truth. It's also the recognition of what doesn't work or bring you closer to having what you say you want.
When you stop pretending and come face to face with what is, you can frankly say, "I don't know how to impact this, cause if I did, I would have already done something about it!" And maybe you did something about it, and then you stopped. It's refreshing to take responsibility for what is happening simultaneously with what's not happening in your life and be honest about not knowing how to have an impact on your desired outcome.
Where can you reach for the truth in your life today?
The following three steps can move you forward with a goal that's been elusive while reaching for the truth in the process:
1) Ask for help. You can research and consider what's possible now without using your past wins and losses as the determining factor. Get a coach or a committed partner to support you; to run the race, go on a diet, or clean up the clutter. This step supported several goals for me this last year. I lost 17 pounds, ran a half- marathon, and wrote a book! What can you start today with some support?
2) Admit your mistakes. Give yourself a break. With the benefit of hindsight, we all could improve what we did or said before. But that time is gone. Plan and take action now. If what you're doing isn't working, admit it. Reach for the facts! The truth creates space to consider something new. Realizations & lessons learned come as you take steps to make what you want happen. I realized I made the same mistake time after time about weight loss. It was always event-driven and about losing a certain number of pounds by a defined date. The result was I lost the weight and then gained it back after the event. When I saw the truth of the matter, it dawned on me that my original goal wasn't bringing me what I desired – which required a sustainable practice that produced health, vitality, and a lean body.
3) Go with the flow. Let go of any attachment to the outcome without giving up on the goal. Your commitment is what makes the difference, not your attachment. Attachment is over-identifying with your results. Commitment says you are doing it. Enjoy the process and allow the truth of what is happening to be present. Progress occurs if you continue your practice of healthy thoughts, words, and actions. I asked my mother-in-law on her 86th birthday what the most important thing she learned after all her years on this planet. She paused for a moment, and said, "To go with the flow!" There were several of us around the table, and we all laughed, recognizing that her words were both poignant and profound. She reminded us that going with the flow allowed us to include whatever showed up without stopping our forward progression. That was ten years ago. She still reminds us today. Thanks, Mom!
May your day be peaceful and productive.
Paulette Sun Davis