impatient, worried, unhappy, or complaining about your life or the actions of others.
People have often asked me why I don't get more upset when times are tough, conversations are hard, and breakdowns are happening. The short answer is I don't want to add pressure to an already difficult situation. Instead, I want to identify the problem and solve it if possible.
Some people say they work better under pressure. I do too, but it's the pressure of a deadline, not the pressure of stress that motivates me. If I have stress, I go for a run. If I have a deadline, I get the work done. I don't add stress to situations, because it doesn't help.
Adding stress doesn't move the dial and often gets in the way by causing people to snap at each other or shut down. When people around you are stressed, it's time to be quiet, listen, and gently move the conversation to what's possible.
Remember the old 1990's bumper sticker that said Sh*t Happens? Seeing that bumper sticker for the first time cracked me up! It was so accurate. BUT how you respond to the sh*t is up to you. Stress happens. So let's make a promise. When stress shows up, focus on what you can do to rethink the situation.
Here are 11 practices to help reframe stressful situations:
1. Understand this too shall pass, it won't be forever, it's just right now
2. Cultivate an attitude of non-attachment to outcomes
3. Stay in the moment and do what you can
4. Say thank you to critical feedback
5. Do your spiritual exercises
6. Write down your goals and take action on what matters most
7. Focus on what's possible instead of complaining about what’s wrong
8. Breathe before you speak, relax your shoulders, and yes you can do this on zoom
9. Focus your attention on what makes you stronger
10. Speak about the facts instead of continually giving opinions
11. Ask for help when you need it
Be careful not to let being uncomfortable become stressful. It's possible to be uncomfortable and not be stressed. Discomfort means you're in the presence of something new, something you haven't done before, which is a reality for all of us today. The good news is getting out of your comfort zone allows for meaningful results. So embrace the discomfort, and you'll find that you are resilient and energetic.
Remember that you're resourceful. Use the 11 practices to release stress by emphasizing what's possible. What are your favorite practices to release stress?
May your day be peaceful and productive.
Paulette Sun Davis