“Decide To Lead” was my magical mantra last week. The unintended consequence of this mantra was setting the leader free in my inner world, and noticing that in some areas I was leading by excuses rather than leading by example!

Is it easier to decide to lead in your outer world: job, conversations, or with other people, and harder when it comes to your inner world of what matters most? This is the question I got back from my readers last week who stopped and asked, “What happens that I don’t make a decision that’s for my highest good, but let my EXCUSES lead the way?”

These are the four common excuses I heard last week:

1. I deserve it. (To overspend or overeat)

2. I need it. (To be happy)

3. I don’t have time. (To eat healthy, exercise, relax, or finish a personal project)

4. It’s too hard. (To change a habit)

Well of course it’s hard! Otherwise you would have already done it, and sustained the practice over time.

The first thing is to decide that you’re going to lead in the areas that matter most to you. Excuses give you permission to do what you know will bring momentary pleasure, and regrets the next day. You can reverse that direction, just like you can reverse the direction of a conversation by setting the leader in you free to listen.

What do you listen to when you’re engaged with your inner leader? Do you listen to your excuses or what you know will be fulfilling?

I was speaking with a good friend and she laughingly said, “I don’t listen to my inner leader when I’m making excuses, I listen to my inner brat.” What does her inner brat say?

1. I don’t want to.

2. I don’t have to

3. You can’t make me.

The practice this week is to set the inner leader in you free, and decide to lead in just one area that would make a difference in your fulfillment. It isn’t hard to decide which area to focus on. It’s the one that is obviously most out of control. Easy to recognize, because it’s the one you talk to yourself about constantly!

Then employ the stop, look, and listen model from Decide To Lead.

1. Stop what you’re doing that got you into the situation. Replace it with a healthy habit. I assert that you do know what to do; you just haven’t done it or you stopped doing it. Begin now.

2. Look at your results daily from practicing the healthy habit, and record your progress each day. You will begin to lead by example instead of excuses, and you’ll have a written record that builds confidence and sustains results.

3. Listen to the leader in you instead of your inner brat. Decide to lead, just like you would with a child that wants to run into the street. You don’t allow that, even if the child tries to pull you in that direction or cries or yells. You just don’t go there. You explain how to stay healthy and safe.

Let me know what happens this week as you decide to lead both in your outer world of work, relationships, and conversations; and your inner world of health and happiness. I respond to all the comments I receive whether posted online or by email.

My love goes with you as you work with this Uplifting Moment.