Thou shall take hug breaks, should be the 12th commandment, right after the 11th commandment, There shall be breakdowns!

Imagine you’re in the middle of a huge confrontation and someone yells out HUG BREAK, and the action stops, and everyone hugs.

You can stop laughing now. It works.

Early in my marriage, during an argument with my husband, he looked at me and said, hug break. It made me laugh and ended in a warm embrace that allowed us to look at what we were arguing about in a different way. The content of the argument could be and was (whatever it was … who remembers?) resolved.

The hug was the background conversation that said I love you. I care about you.

I’ve never had the chutzpah to actually call for a hug break in a business meeting, but the thought has crossed my mind. And when it does, I start smiling and listening more attentively and creatively.

Instead of eye rolling, deep sighs of impatience, arm crossing, or scowling, I’m able to ask questions, and be a beneficial presence.

1. First notice that you’re getting increasingly irritated. This is an important step. You have to act before your irritation spirals out of control.
2. Uncross your arms, and catch the sigh that’s about ready to leave your lips, or the daggers shooting out from your narrowed eyes.
3. Just silently think hug break.
4. Notice the smile that’s turning your mouth upward and lighting your eyes.
5. Notice that your shoulders are relaxing and leaving the vicinity of your ears.
6. Then ask a question.

• What happened?
• What’s your request?
• What do you see is possible?
• What do you think we should do?
• How can I help?

My love goes with you as you work with this Uplifting Moment.

Paulette will be facilitating a Spiritual Retreat at the Center for Spiritual Living in Tahoe City, CA